“If we change in different directions, then we don’t have any future anyway, do we? I think it’s possible for two people to change together, to grow together and enrich instead of diminish each other. The sum of one and one, if they’re the right ones, can be infinity! But so often one person drags the other down; one person wants to go up like a balloon and the other’s a dead weight. I’ve always wondered what it would be like if both people, if a woman and a man both wanted to go up like balloons!” ~ Richard Bach
Richard Bach’s quote is the base for what I call the Balloon Theory. The theory reflects the ultimate relationship between a man and a woman – two balloons flying away with no limitations or restraints. They are in an exclusive bond but they are free to be themselves. Each has a different path but the direction is the same. Each fulfills his own purpose on earth but they are supportive of each other on the way. Each pursues his own desires but the main desire is to be with each other. Each has a unique soul but the goal is to merge them into ONE.
At some point in our lives we’ve all been a balloon and a weight. In some relationships, we seemed to evolve faster than our partner and ended up outgrowing the relationship. We were the balloon and they were the dead weight. In other relationships, our partner continuously grew while we remained stagnant. They were the balloon and we were the weight holding them down. There never seemed to be a balance.
According to the Balloon Theory there are three key ingredients for a lasting relationship – equality, compatibility and synchronicity. The first key ingredient, equality, states that a man and a woman may be made of a different material but on a Universal scale their souls don’t have a gender. One is not better than the other…and one doesn’t fill the void of the other. Instead they compliment and support each other as if they were teammates playing for the same prize…or two balloons flying together in the same direction – UP!
Compatibility is the second key ingredient. As there are many different types of balloons, there are many different types of people. Not all balloons will fly as high or last as long. Not all people have the aspiration to be CEO’s or run a marathon. Find a partner who would not only understand and allow you to grow but also inspire and motivate you on your journey. You’ll both feed off each other’s energy in the process and consequently reach new heights together.
The third and last key ingredient in the Balloon Theory is synchronicity. Just as synchronized swimmers have mastered the skill of moving simultaneously through water, a man and a woman need to master the skill of moving through their relationship in the same pattern. For every act of kindness, support, caring and love there must be reciprocity. This is not about keeping a score or feeling obligated to return the favor to your partner. Instead, it’s about wanting to give and make them happy. The best of relationships are like a two-way street ~ to work, a man and a woman need to synchronize their actions and meet half way.
The Balloon Theory is not fool-proof but it could be used as a guiding tool to our relationships. We don’t have to wonder if a man and a woman could be like two balloons wanting to go in the same direction. Such relationships exist. But it requires heightened awareness to recognize which person in your life is a balloon and which is a dead weight.
© 2007 Zoe Vaklinova – All Rights Reserved